Ana Matronic and I grew up together in San Francisco doing drag at the now legendary club Trannyshack. She arrives in San Francisco at the end of April to perform a live set at Public Works with new material from her upcoming full-length solo record (releasing later this year), with DJ sets from Ana, Seth Kirby and myself. Plus additional performances by Javier Ninja and Benny Ninja of The House of Ninja. The night will also feature an immersive light installation by Seth Kirby and Brock Monroe of the Joshua Light Show. Ana is best known to audiences as the lone female member of rock group Scissor Sisters (who recently announced the bands indefinite hiatus), they have recorded four critically acclaimed albums, earned three BRIT awards, and played to enthusiastic audiences worldwide. She has also recorded and performed with New Order, Duran Duran, and Rupaul’s Drag Race winner Sharon Needles. Ana toured the world last year chanting the new anthem “Let’s Have A Kiki”…and, we all did!

ANAMATRONIC – Shall We Kiki?

Ana Matronic – Shall We Kiki?

Hosted by Juanita MORE!

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Public Works, 161 Erie Street, San Francisco, 94103

9PM-2AM

$15 advance / $20 at the door

Ana and I at Fag Fridays & Trannyshack, Circa 1996

I asked Ana to answer my foodie questionnaire here.

What is your favorite dessert?

Chocolate Chip Cookies, which would also qualify as my all-time favorite food. Also interested in anything densely chocolate, nutty, or salted caramel. I like the kind of dessert that makes you feel winded and have to clutch your side. And then fetch me a coffee and a cognac and a car home, in that order.

What restaurant would you call your home?

Moto in Brooklyn. It opened right before my husband Seth and I started dating and it’s been our favorite ever since. In SF, it’s Dottie’s. Oh, Dottie’s.

What is the strangest or most inspiring thing you’ve ever eaten?

At a gig I did with the Joshua Light Show last year I ate some food that changed flavor as you ate it – “performance” food, if you will – that was really strange, and not exactly tasty, but I appreciated the concept. I also tried Shirako in Japan, which is basically fish sperm & genitalia. Let’s just say that was not to my taste. But you know, when in Rome…

What was your favorite breakfast cereal as a kid?

We weren’t allowed to have sugary cereal in the house, but we did have CW Post granola. And Carnation Breakfast Bars, which I could eat a box at a time. I’m sure you’re pondering my mother’s logic while reading this, as I am while typing it.

What is your favorite food to pig-out on after the club?

Breakfast.

Jordan L’ Moore, Scooter, Juanita, Ana &Portia. Folsom St. Fair, Circa 1997

Robert Jeffrey and Kiki helping each other out.

You all know what a big a foodie I am. And I like to think that I make healthy choices when eating out. I have to be very, very drunk to make someone drive me through a fast food restaurant. For some reason it usually happens mainly when I’m in Los Angeles and especially when I’m hanging out with William.

William driving me through Jack In The Box, 2AM

I’m always fascinated when I see people making sober choices about eating at a fast food joint. That’s if you can understand my drunk reasoning. So I asked two boys in my life – Robert Jeffrey and Kiki – who live to eat America’s junk food, to answer a few questions.

No comment.

What is your favorite fast food restaurant?

Robert Jeffrey: Hmmm it’s so hard to pick one! I like each spot for certain reasons. Like when I go to Burger King I always get the Whopper. It’s my fav fast food burger. Arby’s roast beef sandwich, curly fries, and a Jamocha shake rules. I ball till I fall at Taco Bell, especially if there is a KFC. And on a side note KFC is better than Popeye’s. Wendy’s is also at the top of my list. I’m pretty sure they started the whole dollar menu concept too. What’s not to love about a frosty, a burger, fries and chicken nuggets for less than $5? But if I had to pick one I would go with McDonalds. They have the best all around menu and if I’m up early enough there is nothing better than Mccy D’s breakfast. A sausage McMuffin with the hashbrowns on it is heaven to me. If its lunch time I go with the fish fillet. I could probably eat five of them in one sitting.

Kiki: That is like asking who is your favorite child! It’s really a toss up between Popeye’s Chicken and McDonald’s. Depends on how much grease I want running down my forearm and if it is two piece Tuesdays aka TPT…

What is the one thing you’ve ordered at a fast food restaurant without any shame? 

Kiki: “The Stacker” is a devil sandwich that sister Robert Jeffery taught me by taking a McDouble and McChicken and stacking it together.

Robert Jeffrey: My shameless item is ordering pretty much everything at Taco Bell/KFC. I cringe when they read back the order. You would think I was ordering for an entire family. I also like getting a McChicken McDouble from Mc Donald’s and stacking them together into one sandwich. I call it the McStacker or the McGang-Bang.

What is your favorite snack to buy at the grocery store?

Robert Jeffrey: God I can’t even begin to pick a snack from the grocery store. I like getting something from all the food groups. Something spicy, something sweet (chocolate), something sour/fruity (Sour Patch Kids or Skittles) and something salty. If I get chips I usually go Doritos of some flavor. I like Pepperidge Farms double dark chocolate cookies.

Kiki: I always get Lays original chips and pair it with boxed white wine. Every time I grab a bag I say out loud, “I JUST gotta have my Lays!”.

What is your favorite non-alcoholic beverage?

Kiki: “Hurricane” it is a mix of all the fountain drinks in order, but there is a science to it. You can’t just slam your cup and think you’re getting a sugar drink masterpiece!  Sprite and Cherry Coke are the foundation, followed by Orange Fanta, Dr. Pepper, etc… A Rancho Cordova staple!

Robert Jeffrey: Coca Cola is hands down my favorite non-alcoholic drink. The Mexican bottled ones are one of my top 5 favorite things in the world! I drink wayyyy to much pop. I love adding bitters and cherry juice to my Cokes when I’m in the clurb.

How many times a week do you eat out at fast food restaurants?

Kiki: So much so that I have gentlemen suitors at several Popeye’s locations.

Robert Jeffrey: I go thru spurts of eating fast food. Some weeks at least 2 or 3 times, then I won’t have it for 2 weeks – then I’m back at it again. I guess it all depends on my hangover. I will fuck up some fast food after a long night of drinking.

Whats the biggest order you’ve ever placed?

Kiki: $70+ worth of food at Jack in the Box for a friend and I. I told the associate “The items on the menu… I’ll have that.” We sat crossed legged and laid the food out in a semi circle. It felt like a fast food commander center!!!

Robert Jeffrey: My biggest order is when Stanley Frank and I got 99 cheeseburgers for our Monday night party, Viennetta Discotheque. We also got 4 value meals for us to grub in the DJ booth. On a personal level Kiki and I had a pretty gnarly meal at Taco Bell/KFC recently when they released the Cool Ranch Doritos tacos. They messed up our order so we ended up getting like 7 extra tacos on top of us already ordering 10-12 items. It was amazing!

Kiki, Robert Jeffrey and I.

Robert Jeffrey currently holds DJ residencies at Viennetta Discotheque (every Monday night at SF Underground), Dial Up (monthly at Public Works)  and Booty Call Wednesdays in San Francisco.

Kiki currently serves sass at Bliss Spa in San Francisco.

An Oral History of New York Food: Dining Out Wasn’t Always “In”

My Puerto Rican grandmother was a really great cook. She also took great pride in her position as authority of all things Puerto Rican in the kitchen. I spent many curious afternoons with her as a kid in both her amazing garden and kitchen, trying to figure out how she made some of my family’s favorite dishes. I was most fascinated by watching her make Arroz con Gandules, a combination of rice, pigeon peas and pork, cooked all together in the same pot. It is a dish that is traditionally cooked only around the holidays, though I would request that she made it for me any time of the year. She always obliged – I was her favorite after all. The savory aroma of that rice cooking is still one that brings me right back to my childhood every time I make it now.

Grandma basting the holiday turkey.

The smell of food conjures up memories for everyone. When I’m cooking Puerto Rican food at home, fellow Latin guests can rejoice in the same aromatic and amorous sense of nostalgia. We are bound by the same history of comfort through food.

So when my dear friend, companion, mother, father, brother, sister – Mr. David comes over to create a new gown for me, I in exchange cook for him. And, I know exactly what things make him most happy at my table. Most of you probably think that he survives on cigarettes, coffee, and whiskey. Though that may be true, I know a better way to his heart and also a much more loving way to get that gown finished. It is simply by cooking him Arroz con Gandules or a pot of my grandmother’s chili beans. This exchange has become a cornerstone of our most perfect union and the bridge chartering numerous artistic collaborations.

Mr. David enjoying my grandmothers chili beans.

There is nothing fancy about these beans. They are very simple to make. All they require is the patience to let the beans gently simmer until they are perfectly done.

Chili Beans

3 Tablespoons Achiote lard (recipe follows)
1 pound ground beef
1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
1/4 teaspoon Mexican oregano
1 tablespoon Gebhardt Chili powder
1 bay leaf
1/2 cup Sofrito (recipe follows)
8 ounce can tomato sauce
2 quarts water
1 pound dried pinto beans, rinsed and picked over
1 tablespoon salt

In a heavy Dutch oven over medium-high heat, heat the achiote lard and
add the ground beef to the hot pan and cook, stirring occasionally,
until the meat is well browned, 4 to 6 minutes. Add the chili powder,
cumin, oregano, bay leaf and sofrito and cook about 4 minutes.

Add the tomato sauce, water and beans and bring to a boil. Reduce the
heat to a simmer, partially cover the pot, and cook, stirring
occasionally, until meat and beans are tender and sauce is thick and
flavorful, about 1 1/2 to 2 hours. Add the salt after the first hour
of cooking.

My grandmother used to serve us these beans over a bowl of steamed white rice.

Achiote Lard
1 cup lard
2 tablespoons achiote (annatto) seeds

Heat the lard and annatto seeds in a small skillet over medium heat
just until the seeds give off a lively, steady sizzle. Don’t overheat
the mixture or the seeds will turn black and the oil a nasty green.
Once they’re sizzling away, pull the pan from the heat and let stand
until the sizzling stops. Strain as much of the oil as you are going
to use right away into the pan; store the rest for up to 4 days at
room temperature in a jar with a tight fitting lid.

To make the sofrito follow this link to view a past post.

You could say my most recent visit to Hawaii left me with a bitter taste in my mouth. The island of Oahu is becoming so congested by cars, tourists and our nations military that it doesn’t feel like an island anymore. The roads feel like the freeways of Los Angeles. And, the rows of shops in Waikiki look straight off the strip malls of Las Vegas.

Thus said I am so grateful to have a local family I can call my own. I’m struggling to understand how they are adapting, once again to the growth of their homeland. Growth that has been steadily moving forward since the late 40′s, welcome as it was at that time. The feeling of aloha is getting harder and harder to find.

Lovey at the Tahitian Lanai

So you see – hanging out with Tutu (Lovey) is definitely a highlight when I visit Honolulu. I could sit for hours and listen to her stories about the history of Waikiki in its heyday, all told with a fair amount of piss and vinegar.

Tahitian Lanai

Lovey was a bartender for close to 40 years, working under the umbrella of restaurants owned by the Spencecliff organization, which included Tops, Queen’s Surf and the legendary Tahitian Lanai. She claims to have made the best Mai Tai in town, and only at a cost of $1.50. Even though the cocktail didn’t originate on the island, it’s roots were clearly tropic. Nowadays it’s almost impossible to find a “real” Mai Tai in Waikiki, so many variations are being made to please the palates of cocktail-umbrella seeking tourists.

Tutu’s Mai Tai

1 oz dark rum
1 oz light rum
1/2 ounce Orange Curaçao
1/4 ounce rock candy (simple) syrup
Juice from one fresh lime (about 3/4 ounce)

Pour all of the ingredients except for the dark rum into a shaker with ice cubes. Shake vigorously. Strain into an old-fashioned glass half filled with ice. Top with the dark rum. Garnish with a cherry.

The pantry

The refrigerator.

An accomplished artist. I’ve had the pleasure of being a part of Ariel’s art world.

Artwork by Ariel Dunitz-Johnson

No Seconds

Click image to follow thru to No Seconds.